Thursday, February 04, 2010

How to increase your Readers via SEO ... *Humor* ??

The post is for all the tech geeks and wanna be tech geeks who don't have a clue what SEO means...

No buddyy!!! SEO is not misspelled CEO... it means Search Engine Optimization .. which means how to write so that the search engines recognize ur writings all above the other.... for that you only have to do is follow some basic protocols apart from writing good and creative...

First you go through the examples...

Rahul Gandhi- 

The mumma's boy who is gonna be our next prime minister for a statement in Bihar.. that all the NSG commandoes were from Bihar and U.P. who saved Maharashtra.. 
So what's new???  Whole media said it before when MNS were thrashing the north Indians...

So this is not SEO... as Rahul is already famous and he will automatically rank above the most due to his already popular Image...

but what if u combine the Sena Response.. that Rahul is unmarried so he has grown up horns as no other body part is having any change.. now that is SEO... U add adult contents in the remark and whole nation will read it.. 

So choose ur title wisely... so that it contains keywords which has Adult value as wateva we all say ..we search adult things pretty regularly on internet...

Jokes Apart: Don't you think Rahul Gandhi is another hoax.. his party is running both Central government in India and State government of what is stopping him to take action against the people who are dividing people racially????... lol... 

Now see ..he used Search Engine Optimisation technique For Bihar election.. all he has to say motivating word for Biharis and they will flock to vote for him and ultimately he is not going to do anything except talk and talk...

Shahrukh Khan :

My name is Khan and I am an Indian and I will play Pakistani Players... 
WoW bold...!!! I salute you for that.. because ur speech which is so inspiring still are all SEOs... I won't blame you.. as you actually wanted a free controversial publicity for KKR in upcoming IPL 3 and his film..which Amir got from Chetan Bhagat controversy.. but your words were so SEO that you are now all over... lol... but at least you have the guts to follow up what u said unlike Amitabh who has gone to Bal Thackeray to show his film Rann which nobody else wanna see...

Now above two examples are already how can you ..the common can be famous...??? So the next example follows :

MNS , Shivsena and Petty politics :

See.. Do u know who leads Janta dal united or where it rules.. but u all know who are ruling these too parties... because they used SEO...and now are better known than most national party...

First they started with Verbal abuse to national celebrity like Amitabh  Bachan, then they started accusing Sachin Tendulkar , then Australian cricketers and now Shahrukh Khan...

Then they occasionally beat up fellow Indians to show their vandalism oops and all we do is talk about how bad they are and other parties are afraid of losing Maratha Manus... I guess they are people who are actually Aliens who has colonized Mumbai..

And Now they said... 'Don't blame me if people of Maharashtra.. ( The aliens > " Maratha Manus" ) wants to go separate from India'.... 

See now they are talking like Separatist which in times of Peace are called as Terrorists and they are again all over the news... lol ..and that is the best SEO  and you will be recognized world wide....

So you see these are the examples of how SEO can be used...

So summing it up in 5 points...

1) Be popular from prior
2) Use Adult words in your Vocabs and links
3) Beat Up people or thrash them in your blog
4) Oppose whatever good is there as people like negative thoughts and write it bold and  clear
5) Last but not the list.. u can be a terrorist like Kasab and  MNS and Shivsena who wants a separate homeland

PS:  This post is dedicated to my  sister  who is new to blogging world and is worried because she gets so low traffic inspite of writing so good and all the people who wanna know how to get a good Page Rank ( How Google defines ur website ) and high traffic... rather than being a follower to all the site you visit and want them to be urs....

Wake up India.. 

Love and Carez....


  1. lol!!too good man, thanks for giving us tips to become a SEO!! :P

  2. LOL!!! :D
    Loved the post and the bashing u gave all of them!The phrase 'colonisation of mumbai' is jperfect to describe the situation thet r creating :@

  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

  4. wah !wah! kya introduction hai mera aur kya dedication hai tera.thanx
    thanx mere bhi shaayad tere yahan ki publicity mere kuch kam aye.waise tune likha acha hai
    tera template phir badal gaya ?
    lekin lake of my dreams ka lake nahin dikha. zara pata kar kahin sare ped(tree) pani to zyada nahin le best of luck for next .loved your post .

  5. i already implement most of the techniques

  6. bhai kaha ho yaar??? mujhe aap ko call karna hai.... gimme ur num or call me....

  7. kya bat hai ji....i will definitely try to implement to increase my webpage hitting :)..


  8. lol! You are on a roll... Excellent piece!

    Mumbai me jo kar rahe hai ab to believe hi nahi hota. Roj subah naya kuch soch ke chap dete hai. Media ko bhi inka chapne ke sivaye koi kam nahi. Kisi journal me paper publish kiya hai jaise lagta hai, jaise end me summary points diye hai. Sahi, ekdum mast.

    Maine didi ka blog visit kiya hai. Aur apke gadhe avatar ke post bhi bahut acchi tarah se dekha hai.

    Bhaisab blog me naya kya dala hai, mobile hang ho jata hai....? Pehle no problem tha?

  9. Akanksha..

    lol!! Shivsena adds flavor to alreayd boring news segment... now watching news is more fun than UTV action...

    thanks for liking the post..

  10. Didi..

    lol... wo lake sookh gya hai.. water crisis.... :D

    and I am going to change my blog title to something else... :D

  11. Reetes..
    number toh wohi hai... main bich mein thoda busy tha...

  12. Samby...

    mumbai ka news ab bollywood se jyada masaledar hai... lol...
    aur sensationalized version dekhna ho toh India TV dekhna...

    yaar blog toh maine aur halka kar diya hai... I guess I will have to change my template again...mujhe pasand nhi aa raha... next week sure...

    aur chuutiyan kaisi chal rahi hai ??

  13. thanks amigo! great post!

  14. Hey, I am checking this blog using the phone and this appears to be kind of odd. Thought you'd wish to know. This is a great write-up nevertheless, did not mess that up.

    - David

  15. Hola, Interesante, no va a continuar con este artнculo?.

  16. David...

    I chose the template that google provides for easy access on phone.. I am glad you liked it.. but do explain me the problem if you come to check again so that i can rectify it..


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