Showing posts with label joke. Show all posts
Showing posts with label joke. Show all posts

Monday, September 13, 2010

Men are always men

Adult contents inside..Minors should not read.... :D 
The logic behind the man to chose his perfect wife...
MAN:
I had three girlfriends, but wasn’t sure which one to marry. So I decided to give each one $5000 and see how each of them spends it.

The first one went out and gets a total makeover with the money. She gets new clothes, a new hairdo, manicure, pedicure, the works, and comes back to my place and says, “I spent the money so I could look pretty for you because I love you so much.” I was very touched and aroused, and we had lots of great sex.


The second one went out and bought new golf clubs, a CD player, a television, and a stereo and brings them back to me as gifts. This sweet girl looked into my eyes and said, “I bought these gifts for you with the money because I love you so much.” I watched my new television with great enjoyment!

The third one takes the $5000 and invested it in the stock market, doubled her investment, returns the original $5000 to me and reinvests the rest. She says, “I am investing the rest of the money for our future because I love you so much.” She has enough to buy me a new boat.

I thought long and hard about how each of the women spent the money and decided to marry the one with the biggest breasts!

Me: Which one of the three it was...??

Man: The bar girl where I used to date those three girls...

................
 
PS: Life is indeed stressy.. I hope reading a light joke always de-stress




Tuesday, April 27, 2010

A lil renovation...

Yeah!!!! Thrown off all the junks.. I was hating my blog.. it took so long to load.. and my net was down and I was busy playing mafia....
Was thinking of writing something but then I thought leave it alone for today ..will update with something good tomorrow.. I am thinking of writing two series... one on War and one on Religion...I dnt know how much I will succeed.. but I am gonna be regular in reading many blogs and leaving my comment.. will have to clean up the blogroll who don't visit here but I guess I already did that... the few of you who come here quite a often will have a good treat coz I m gonna update a lot in coming months..

For now a Joke to lighten up the spirit..


A she ant said something to an elephant and he got a heart attack .. what did she say???
I am going to be mother of your child...:P

Same ant went up to Tiger and he too had a heart attack..what did she say ??

I am just having doubt who the father of my unborn baby is .. elephant is claiming it his and I know from my heart it is urs..


lol....

Watched.. My Name is Khan.. and yeah it was a wonderful movie... but I was happy I took long time to watch it as only now DVD print has been released and it is not worthy enough to watch in theatre...









Thursday, February 04, 2010

How to increase your Readers via SEO ... *Humor* ??

The post is for all the tech geeks and wanna be tech geeks who don't have a clue what SEO means...

No buddyy!!! SEO is not misspelled CEO... it means Search Engine Optimization .. which means how to write so that the search engines recognize ur writings all above the other.... for that you only have to do is follow some basic protocols apart from writing good and creative...

First you go through the examples...

Rahul Gandhi- 

The mumma's boy who is gonna be our next prime minister for sure..gives a statement in Bihar.. that all the NSG commandoes were from Bihar and U.P. who saved Maharashtra.. 
So what's new???  Whole media said it before when MNS were thrashing the north Indians...

So this is not SEO... as Rahul is already famous and he will automatically rank above the most due to his already popular Image...

but what if u combine the Sena Response.. that Rahul is unmarried so he has grown up horns as no other body part is having any change.. now that is SEO... U add adult contents in the remark and whole nation will read it.. 

So choose ur title wisely... so that it contains keywords which has Adult value as wateva we all say ..we search adult things pretty regularly on internet...

Jokes Apart: Don't you think Rahul Gandhi is another hoax.. his party is running both Central government in India and State government of Maharashtra..so what is stopping him to take action against the people who are dividing people racially????... lol... 

Now see ..he used Search Engine Optimisation technique For Bihar election.. all he has to say motivating word for Biharis and they will flock to vote for him and ultimately he is not going to do anything except talk and talk...

Shahrukh Khan :

My name is Khan and I am an Indian and I will play Pakistani Players... 
WoW bold...!!! I salute you for that.. because ur speech which is so inspiring still are all SEOs... I won't blame you.. as you actually wanted a free controversial publicity for KKR in upcoming IPL 3 and his film..which Amir got from Chetan Bhagat controversy.. but your words were so SEO that you are now all over... lol... but at least you have the guts to follow up what u said unlike Amitabh who has gone to Bal Thackeray to show his film Rann which nobody else wanna see...


Now above two examples are already famous..now how can you ..the common can be famous...??? So the next example follows :

MNS , Shivsena and Petty politics :

See.. Do u know who leads Janta dal united or where it rules.. but u all know who are ruling these too parties... because they used SEO...and now are better known than most national party...

First they started with Verbal abuse to national celebrity like Amitabh  Bachan, then they started accusing Sachin Tendulkar , then Australian cricketers and now Shahrukh Khan...

Then they occasionally beat up fellow Indians to show their vandalism oops Nationalism..lol.. and all we do is talk about how bad they are and other parties are afraid of losing Maratha Manus... I guess they are people who are actually Aliens who has colonized Mumbai..

And Now they said... 'Don't blame me if people of Maharashtra.. ( The aliens > " Maratha Manus" ) wants to go separate from India'.... 

See now they are talking like Separatist which in times of Peace are called as Terrorists and they are again all over the news... lol ..and that is the best SEO  and you will be recognized world wide....



So you see these are the examples of how SEO can be used...

So summing it up in 5 points...

1) Be popular from prior
2) Use Adult words in your Vocabs and links
3) Beat Up people or thrash them in your blog
4) Oppose whatever good is there as people like negative thoughts and write it bold and  clear
5) Last but not the list.. u can be a terrorist like Kasab and  MNS and Shivsena who wants a separate homeland

PS:  This post is dedicated to my  sister  who is new to blogging world and is worried because she gets so low traffic inspite of writing so good and all the people who wanna know how to get a good Page Rank ( How Google defines ur website ) and high traffic... rather than being a follower to all the site you visit and want them to be urs....

Wake up India.. 

Love and Carez....





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