Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Future prediction
Dis the look alike picture dat Sara has drawn dat how will i look like after 20 years..jus by imagination
Dis clearly suggests ki how much anger and frsutration she had in her mind while she was painting my cute pic :P
and da crown is my nobel prize for being da grtest of nerds ...:P
Oh my god!..
I cant control laughing
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
One more gal added in "hate u sourish" list
Last day was a bit of a turmoil..
:)
I dint took da dream stop pill...and i had a nasty nite mare....and dat resulted me falling from my bed...even wen i fell down..it really took me an hour to get to kno dat..I m in reality ..not in dreams..only wen da pain became unbearablle..I realised dat its a dream..lolz
i fell on my fractured hand...and da whole 3 weeks of patience gone in haywire....and I got da inflammation again...lolz
So i went up to the doctor..and dere i got the fone of a gal....she said me..dat i rang her few days back....oh forgot dis was da gal..who was quite a fone frnd..and I stopped calling her wen she had grown obsessive of me and confessed dat she loves me...and I knew da best solution is stop calling her frequently...
and here came her blasting fone..if u don hav any thing more to say..I m puttin down my fone...coz i don have money and time to waste on ya..I hate u coz u used me as a time pass...
Now tell me...I used her as a time pass..we met in orkut..she dialed my nummer first..we were quite a good frnd..so i called her back...she had some family troubles..so I called her few more times..and ended up in talking every alternate days..jus wen i came to kno dat she loves me...So wat shud b my reply..I love u tooo..??:O ...Now if a gal says m not in love wid u coz m in love wid any oder guy its justified..and if a boy says dat..den he is fake , flirt, fuker...and blah blah..
If a gal says..u took advantage of my frndship..den da gal is rite..coz she saw da boy wid her frndly eyes..and all curse falls on da boy..who hav lusty eyes... and in vice versa..if boy says i took u as a frnd always..den da gal is a poor soul..and da boy da crookest ..and flirtmost soul of the universe..... such a descrimination..den also we say its a male dominating society...:D
So i put down da fone..coz as I was wid da doctor..i cudnt say more to her..except bye..coz..she brought da issue of money and time wid our frndship..and I don liked it..moreover i cudnt pacify her..coz i was in docs chamber..who is quite a busy soul...
In the evening ...sara came..
and wen i told her abt da gal..she asked me a funny ques..
do u fake ur realtion wid me too??? ....
The whole day i was disturbed loosing a frnd..and she came here wid dis ques..now wat shud I answer..we are talking for last few months..non stop..I never asked for anything..she cant show me her foto..cant tell her name..even cant give me her nummer...coz some psycho is manhandling her fone...and she don wanna increase da list.....Did I ever asked any more..neva..so wat do I get in faking wid her..I cant understand...wat shud ...i need to do to prove myself to dem..every1 needed me ..so I was frnd sumtime more dan a frnd to dem..and if i need sum1 den i hav to pass exams...I m sick n tired of saying dat i m not faking..and my cares are not fake...
And here comes da magical answer of sara...
(11:40:30 PM) saarah: u can widout eating u can widout slping too
(11:40:36 PM) sourish: a relation is need to be taken seriously by both sides
(11:40:44 PM) saarah: c ya dd
(11:40:51 PM) saarah: yeah ourz was never was
Now tell me..after so much time..and so many things...she is saying me dis...
:(
All gals are same..dey all are jus same..
Dey jus think dat boy are exploiting dere meekness and hav fun in exploiting dere sisters..lolz
like
Boys dont hav any oder work.. :D
And here is my sweetheart..she dint ever cared to reply me..coz she thinks ..I made her fall in love wid plannings...
ufff
One day i will hang myself.....X-(..
M really sick and tired of getting dese treatments from gals..for whom i spent countless sleepless nites..an moments pacifying and soothing dere pain..
arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
X-(
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Please come back
Today I tried one of my last tries..dat she come back in my life..unscathed and jus like she left me..its areally long time..i dint heard of her...she told me.." Dis time u will kno..wat is called leaving"
Dat time i felt dat...I can handle it..but today...I felt dat..No i cant handle it...
taking a break from my pills..i really wanna dream her..and even if she destroy me dere..i happy to be brain dead..jus giving a try ...may be in my dreams..we cud spend da happy time once more dat we used to spend together...
Please come back...
take care son...
Dat time i felt dat...I can handle it..but today...I felt dat..No i cant handle it...
taking a break from my pills..i really wanna dream her..and even if she destroy me dere..i happy to be brain dead..jus giving a try ...may be in my dreams..we cud spend da happy time once more dat we used to spend together...
Please come back...
take care son...
Friday, January 26, 2007
Rememberance
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
wats happening ...
I m missing her so bad..dat I keep dreaming about her...her image got dissolved in my dream..may be the medicines are effective..coz dey promised for no dreams..but my feelings for her is so tense and m missing her so badly..she repeatedly comes back in my dreams...
But I wont write her back..coz she just questioned my character...and da person who don believe me...has no plae in my life..even if it makes a void...coz even i call back..I don kno whether she will answer or not..but if she comes..our relation wont b da same..i will keep thinking dat she is not trusting me..and I can talk to any 1 who thinks m a traitor...so I call it an end...
Though I m missing her badly...and I kno she will be dere in my heart forever...
Thank God she has dis minor or wateva..and she don hav serious prob..but yesterday she accused me so bad.....and about giving her nummme..hehehe..I wont say anething..as she keeps reading here....
God..please..please give me strength to carry on...
But I wont write her back..coz she just questioned my character...and da person who don believe me...has no plae in my life..even if it makes a void...coz even i call back..I don kno whether she will answer or not..but if she comes..our relation wont b da same..i will keep thinking dat she is not trusting me..and I can talk to any 1 who thinks m a traitor...so I call it an end...
Though I m missing her badly...and I kno she will be dere in my heart forever...
Thank God she has dis minor or wateva..and she don hav serious prob..but yesterday she accused me so bad.....and about giving her nummme..hehehe..I wont say anething..as she keeps reading here....
God..please..please give me strength to carry on...
Monday, January 22, 2007
Yesterday....
Yesterday ....was da revelation day...
lots of facts got revealed to me....My dearest frnd is not doing well...my reports are not so good...and dere r people who still care...
My two day net black out..caused so much misunderstanding...dat it was nearly devastating..
But all wells dat ends well..after a long tusseling and wrestling session..jus like always we are frnds again..dats I like about sara...dat she never leave me...even wen m hell like to her...really I think I need to thank da almighty ..dat he made me so llucky dat m so close to her...
wat was dat ..yeah 11 or 12 th in her life
hehehehhe
oops ....she dont prioritize :P
And dere's my son..yesterday we had... I nd sara had a fight cause of her..coz i don wanna discuss her..coz her relation to me ..I havnt given any 1 rights to discuss..jus like I don like any1 discuss sara..
They are the two poles of my life...widout dem..I m jus a mere loadstone...
Going to skoooooooooool
Take care
lots of facts got revealed to me....My dearest frnd is not doing well...my reports are not so good...and dere r people who still care...
My two day net black out..caused so much misunderstanding...dat it was nearly devastating..
But all wells dat ends well..after a long tusseling and wrestling session..jus like always we are frnds again..dats I like about sara...dat she never leave me...even wen m hell like to her...really I think I need to thank da almighty ..dat he made me so llucky dat m so close to her...
wat was dat ..yeah 11 or 12 th in her life
hehehehhe
oops ....she dont prioritize :P
And dere's my son..yesterday we had... I nd sara had a fight cause of her..coz i don wanna discuss her..coz her relation to me ..I havnt given any 1 rights to discuss..jus like I don like any1 discuss sara..
They are the two poles of my life...widout dem..I m jus a mere loadstone...
Going to skoooooooooool
Take care
Saturday, January 20, 2007
The dreams
Yesterday..I got my report..doctors are not happy wid the trial of their medicine...I don kno..wat will happen..but itz all resulting in erratic dreams..evn after gud 9 hours sleep ...I m feeling like to sleep forever....
In the morning sara wrote me offliness..dat m love wid my strawberry...Now the ques arises..m i ready to admit abt the love..but missing my son very much...
Last night I dreamt of her..dat she wanna kill me for she believes dat I m the one who played wid her life..I was so scared..even I had a gun in my hand..par I cudnt point in her direction...rather dan I dint ran away..may be my trust is still alive ...when she was bombarding wid bullets..it was real paining..the pain in dose places are still dere wen m woke up..Now m really afraid..as am sure that dese medis are taking thier toll..
Good day
take care
In the morning sara wrote me offliness..dat m love wid my strawberry...Now the ques arises..m i ready to admit abt the love..but missing my son very much...
Last night I dreamt of her..dat she wanna kill me for she believes dat I m the one who played wid her life..I was so scared..even I had a gun in my hand..par I cudnt point in her direction...rather dan I dint ran away..may be my trust is still alive ...when she was bombarding wid bullets..it was real paining..the pain in dose places are still dere wen m woke up..Now m really afraid..as am sure that dese medis are taking thier toll..
Good day
take care
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Redefining relation
Sara..wanna marry on 14th Feb..
lolz
She lightened me up really..and I m started to redefine my relationship back to frnds ..coz i really enjoyed her frndship more than anything..and sum how I kno..she is comfortable wen she hears da word FRIEND rather than love..So be it..
And Deep in bottom I kno..I m still not over my son...aBut Sara did deserve sumthing special..coz she is really special to me...
Gudnite
I hate wen I don get to sleep
In The morning, When I checked in via my frnds account..she was gone ..gone from the orkut..may be orkut has certain problems..but I cudnt find her anywhere..I was so shocked..
She did uttered da word
"Chhorna kise kehte hai yeh ab dekhoge"
Now I really fear..did she meant it :(
Uff its pathetically sad...and how hard I wanna pen down a letter to her..asking for her forgiveness..not to talk to her again..but jus don wanaa end like dis..
Ireally don understand..when i confessed earlier to her..dat I did flirted wid her..oops it was written in my farmers italian..I think she dint got it den..but the way shereacted ...dO I deserve it..yeah may be i had some tricks on my gloves..but I don remember I used any to her..I confessed her my feeling..I cried for her..I drank, i slashed down my wrist...I don kno wat to do abt it...
I jus don understand..when i agreed to the fact that we wont be together..y she is thinking dat i played wid her...
I did called for it..I kno the exact words..I really penned down knowingly..so dat she can leave me..and even wen she was back...I knew..it wud hav eased her pain..but I knowingly dint stopped her..coz I really don kno ..wat will happen next in my life...
But I must confess..I dint took it well... :(..M I still not over ...
But i shud go on wid it
Coz I kno..she hates me now..and I kno I called for it..
Hope Almighty forgive me for wrathing her to leave me
God bless u son
Take care..
She did uttered da word
"Chhorna kise kehte hai yeh ab dekhoge"
Now I really fear..did she meant it :(
Uff its pathetically sad...and how hard I wanna pen down a letter to her..asking for her forgiveness..not to talk to her again..but jus don wanaa end like dis..
Ireally don understand..when i confessed earlier to her..dat I did flirted wid her..oops it was written in my farmers italian..I think she dint got it den..but the way shereacted ...dO I deserve it..yeah may be i had some tricks on my gloves..but I don remember I used any to her..I confessed her my feeling..I cried for her..I drank, i slashed down my wrist...I don kno wat to do abt it...
I jus don understand..when i agreed to the fact that we wont be together..y she is thinking dat i played wid her...
I did called for it..I kno the exact words..I really penned down knowingly..so dat she can leave me..and even wen she was back...I knew..it wud hav eased her pain..but I knowingly dint stopped her..coz I really don kno ..wat will happen next in my life...
But I must confess..I dint took it well... :(..M I still not over ...
But i shud go on wid it
Coz I kno..she hates me now..and I kno I called for it..
Hope Almighty forgive me for wrathing her to leave me
God bless u son
Take care..
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Y I renamed my blog
The only reason to change the blog adddress is dat the ppl shudnt be taking this blog as an apology or desperate effort to get them back..i want that dis blog shud also perform the duty wat itz been for dat is keeping weblog :)
gudnite...
gudnite...
Who am I?
Who am I?
Two of my gud frnds
whom i really care about last day threw me a ques..
M i making joke outta dem ?
Here is da young gals response
All through this time when i was close to you, you played wid me...
Play wid her..My god
Think wats dis playing is worth for, I spent dozens of sleepless nite waiting to hear her response, when she was away,( yeah I know she wasnt away like dat wat she is now)..and she says m playing.. :O
Now I really dont kno, if i cant see her,I heard her voice only a few times, all the time i read her replies in messenger and replied wid my broken hand..she says m playing wid her..now wats da trophy m getting outta it..if she admits dat she loves me and cares about me, Will i get a noble prize? or a olympic gold medal...all i ever anted to talk to her..coz i liked being wid her..not because she was heavenly beautiful..but she was da one who let out da kid in me..we really had a gud time wid all those h after s replacing r by l ..j by t..several called me insane..yet i happily took it..but I doon understand y she calling me traitor..all i had done is..i interactedwid her wid a purpose of getting frnd..not getting her love..Love ..lolz wats dis love stands for in internet..itz only time to spend..so dat we can ease the pain of the reality..to be ourselves..lolz she thot i planned to put her in my arms......
lolz
And dere is dis nice gal..wenever m low and crying she is dere wid helping hands..she had got her sum1..but yet she never given me any less treatment dan wat wud hav she given him too..she never failed to say me sorry after any big fight..and she always returned back to me..and wat m doing to her..nuffin..everytime i make her worried and come crying..I just used her a lot like my own diary to tell her all my secrets to comfort me...and i always used her as A TV set..whom i always say that she is making me one..but for last few days..I m getting real obsessed about her..may be i don kno her..i havnt seen her..may be dis curiosity is making me
..getting moire closer to her..and I really don understand ..y I m getting addicted of her?
But
Jus wen i expected to get an answer from her..dat who am I?..She gave her answer..
"plz :) dis is stupid i know but thr r things which r better not mentioned coz dey r bout the real me not bout sarah"
So ...
lolz
and m back again wid da same question" Who am I?"
In jus days whole of my world changed...let it be for some1s good..else..wats da use ?
Take care
Two of my gud frnds
whom i really care about last day threw me a ques..
M i making joke outta dem ?
Here is da young gals response
All through this time when i was close to you, you played wid me...
Play wid her..My god
Think wats dis playing is worth for, I spent dozens of sleepless nite waiting to hear her response, when she was away,( yeah I know she wasnt away like dat wat she is now)..and she says m playing.. :O
Now I really dont kno, if i cant see her,I heard her voice only a few times, all the time i read her replies in messenger and replied wid my broken hand..she says m playing wid her..now wats da trophy m getting outta it..if she admits dat she loves me and cares about me, Will i get a noble prize? or a olympic gold medal...all i ever anted to talk to her..coz i liked being wid her..not because she was heavenly beautiful..but she was da one who let out da kid in me..we really had a gud time wid all those h after s replacing r by l ..j by t..several called me insane..yet i happily took it..but I doon understand y she calling me traitor..all i had done is..i interactedwid her wid a purpose of getting frnd..not getting her love..Love ..lolz wats dis love stands for in internet..itz only time to spend..so dat we can ease the pain of the reality..to be ourselves..lolz she thot i planned to put her in my arms......
lolz
And dere is dis nice gal..wenever m low and crying she is dere wid helping hands..she had got her sum1..but yet she never given me any less treatment dan wat wud hav she given him too..she never failed to say me sorry after any big fight..and she always returned back to me..and wat m doing to her..nuffin..everytime i make her worried and come crying..I just used her a lot like my own diary to tell her all my secrets to comfort me...and i always used her as A TV set..whom i always say that she is making me one..but for last few days..I m getting real obsessed about her..may be i don kno her..i havnt seen her..may be dis curiosity is making me
..getting moire closer to her..and I really don understand ..y I m getting addicted of her?
But
Jus wen i expected to get an answer from her..dat who am I?..She gave her answer..
"plz :) dis is stupid i know but thr r things which r better not mentioned coz dey r bout the real me not bout sarah"
So ...
lolz
and m back again wid da same question" Who am I?"
In jus days whole of my world changed...let it be for some1s good..else..wats da use ?
Take care
Monday, January 15, 2007
deleting orkut :O now wat happened :O:P
Two of my frnd left me today
reason i made da joke out of dem
dey gone crying
n m her drinking
lolz
n deleting one more orkut account
i will get a diploma on deletion of da profiles
lolz
take care all
again itz paining me so hard..m a grt addict
reason i made da joke out of dem
dey gone crying
n m her drinking
lolz
n deleting one more orkut account
i will get a diploma on deletion of da profiles
lolz
take care all
again itz paining me so hard..m a grt addict
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